I wish we could make out in your bed.Noah sighed. As do I, but I’m afraid we have ritual burning to conduct.It’s always something.Isn’t it though?
We spend the first 12 months of our children’s lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next 12 months teaching them to sit down and shut up.
You don’t always have to kiss a lot of frogs to recognize a prince when you find one -Henrietta Barett
A morning coffee is my favorite way of starting the day, settling the nerves so that they don’t later fray.
Gordon Edgley’s sudden death came as a shock to everyone – not least himself. One moment he was in his study, seven words into the twenty-fifth sentence of the final chapter of his new book, And the Darkness Rained upon Them, and the next he was dead. A tragic loss, his mind echoed numbly as he slipped away.
This book is dedicated to the voices inside my head, the most remarkable of my friends. And to my wife, who lives with us.
No man’s life, liberty, or property are safe while the legislature is in session.
Unrequited love is so boring. Weeping under a blue-black sky is for suckers or maniacs.
He has fought many battles with us (Jace) By which you mean one battle muttered Simon. Two if you count the one I was a rat
Doing business without advertising is like winking at a girl in the dark. You know what you are doing but nobody else does.
Mary had a little lamb, its fleece electrostatic / And everywhere Mary went, the lights became erratic.
There are approximately 1,010,300 words in the English language, but I could never string enough words together to properly express how much I want to hit you with a chair. (Alexander Hamilton, to Thomas Jefferson)
We seemed to be trapped in an episode of One Life To Waste. It’s all very dull.
… for most practical purposes, Tarbean had two parts: Waterside and Hillside. Waterside is where people are poor. That makes them beggars, thieves and whores. Hillside is where people are rich. That makes them solicitors, politicians and courtesans.
It is impossible to enjoy idling thoroughly unless one has plenty of work to do. There is no fun in doing nothing when you have nothing to do. Wasting time is merely an occupation then, and a most exhausting one. Idleness, like kisses, to be sweet must be stolen.
Insanity does NOT run in my family. It strolls through, takes its time, and gets to know everyone personally. —T-SHIRT
It’s the idea that people living close to nature tend to be noble. It’s seeing all those sunsets that does it. You can’t watch a sunset and then go off and set fire to your neighbor’s tepee. Living close to nature is wonderful for your mental health.
I bet, said Mulch, that you would set the world on fire just to watch it burn.Opal tapped the suggestion into a small electronic notepad on her pocket computer.Thanks for that. Now, tell me everything.
Hale. Kat sighed. The headmaster’s car? Really? That’s not to cliched for you?What can I say? He shrugged. I’m an old-fashioned guy. Besides, it’s a classic for a reason. He leaned against the window. It’s good to see you, Kat.Kat didn’t know what to say. It’s good to see you, too? Thanks for getting me kicked out? Is it possible you’ve gotten even hotter? I think I might have missed you?
I hate the vamp jobs. They think they’re so suave. It’s not enough for them to slaughter and eat you like a zombie would. No, they want to be all sexy, too. And trust me: vampires? Not. Sexy.
Hmm…now that I think about it, housecats are often coddled and petted. You don’t pet me nearly enough. You must be a lax owner. How selfish of you to deprive your cat of attention.
Good-humor is a philosophic state of mind; it seems to say to Nature that we take her no more seriously than she takes us. I maintain that one should always talk of philosophy with a smile.
We’ll meet at the theater tonight. I’ll hold your seat ’til you get there. Once you get there; you’re on your own.
Discipline allows magic. To be a writer is to be the very best of assassins. You do not sit down and write every day to force the Muse to show up. You get into the habit of writing every day so that when she shows up, you have the maximum chance of catching her, bashing her on the head, and squeezing every last drop out of that bitch.
He moved to sniff some white-and-yellow flowers.A nightmare. This was a nightmare. “You can’t really like flowers.”Again those dark eyes shifted to her. Blinked once. I most certainly do, he seemed to say.
When I was little I bragged about my firefighting father: my father would go to heaven, because if he went to hell he would put out all the fires
A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain.
I have nightmares about hell, where all I do is add up numbers and try to have conversations with people like you.
Miss Fitt, you know curiosity gets men killed.I grinned. Then I daresay it’s good I’m a woman.
Basically, all women are nurturers and healers, and all men are mental patients to varying degrees.
Apparently, dancing for him and throwing herself at him weren’t enough. Apparently, she had to nearly commit murder to arouse him enough to attack her.
I’m happy to tell you there is very little in this world that I believe in.
There are those who scoff at the schoolboy, calling him frivolous andshallow: Yet it was the schoolboy who said ‘Faith is believing what youknow ain’t so’.
Heaven has no taste.Now-And not one single sushi restaurant.A look of pain crossed the angel’s suddenly very serious face.
Gimme an S! A T! An O! A C! Followed by a K-H-O-L-M! What’s it spell? HEAD FUCK.- Jane
Bruce Wayne’s parents get killed and he goes to Tibet or whatever, and Superman is an alien, and Spiderman had that radioactive spider. Me? I kissed a janitor in the school bathroom.
I’d have been dead a long time ago if not for my friends, one of whom had just jumped off the cliff after me. I’d have been a lot more appreciative if he hadn’t pushed me first. ~Cassandra Palmer
Books are to me as homemade tattoos are to an inmate. Can’t get enough of them.
Holly’s theory about the army, Sharon explained.And what is it? Denise asked, intrigued.Oh, that fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.
Sex is like air; it’s not important unless you aren’t getting any.
Bishops move diagonally. That’s why they often turn up where the kings don’t expect them to be.
Finding a life partner is like choosing a bed. You need one as a friend either in times of health or sickness. Freshness or weariness. Happiness or sadness. And we can be certain that we’ve picked the right one without having to sleep with it first.
Mulling this over, Vlad wiped her lip gloss from his lips with the back of his hand.Vampires, after all, didn’t sparkle.
I had learned that you should always shout louder than your aggressor.
Not too fast, called Raoul. Let’s not scare anyone.His majesty said with all deliberate speed! chirped the courier. He flinched under Lerant’s glare. That’s how we’re doing it, Raoul told him. Deliberately.
I sometimes think I prefer suitors in books rather than right in front of me. How awful, backward, cowardly, and mentally warped that will be if it turns out to be true.
First Pallas and now you,” the gray-haired man said, shaking his head at Nick. “It’s like I’m running a goddamn dating service around here.
Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There is too much fraternizing with the enemy.
A man in love is incomplete until he has married. Then he’s finished.
You want to change? Lose the bitch. Be nicer to people. Stop telling them to bite you and threatening to kick them until they’re dead.
My bookcase is all yours.I walked to the door. I’ve just decided that those are my favorite five words in the world.
Every time you come in yelling that God damn Rise and Shine! Rise and Shine! I say to myself, How lucky dead people are!
Librarians are the secret masters of the world. They control information. Don’t ever piss one off.
You know how spooky Ashwini is. She called an hour ago to tell me she has a secret stash of handheld grenade launchers she thought I might want to know about. My response was, ‘What the fuck?
Principled hate is a hell of a lot stronger than Boy, I wish you hadn’t mummified me and thrown me into the lake hate.
While browsing in a second-hand bookshop one day, George Bernard Shaw was amused to find a copy of one of his own works which he himself had inscribed for a friend: To —-, with esteem, George Bernard Shaw.He immediately purchased the book and returned it to the friend with a second inscription: With renewed esteem, George Bernard Shaw.