Technically, I am unarmed. But no one should ever underestimate the harm that fingernails can do. Especially if the target is unprepared.
Do you mean ter tell me, he growled at the Dursleys, that this boy—this boy!—knows nothin’ abou’—about ANYTHING?Harry thought this was going a bit far. He had been to school, after all, and his marks weren’t bad.I know some things, he said. I can, you know, do math and stuff.
I didn’t know that idiocy caused people to just start spontaneously bleeding from the nose.
When we come face-to-face with one down a dark alley, we’re going to be having a shufti to see if it’s solid, aren’t we, we’re not going to be asking, ‘Excuse me, are you the imprint of a departed soul?
The only way a woman can ever reform a man is by boring him so completely that he loses all possible interest in life.
Usually my form of turning someone down was shoving a stake through his heart while smirking, Gotcha!
She held up her calloused, grimy fingers. Leo couldn’t help thinking there was nothing hotter than a girl who didn’t mind getting her hands dirty. But of course, that was just a general comment. Didn’t apply to Calypso. Obviously.
One of the things Ford Prefect had always found hardest to understand about humans was their habit of continually stating and repeating the very very obvious.
Oh well… I’d just been thinking, if you had died, you’d have been welcome to share my toilet.
Rachel: You’re a half-blood, too?Annabeth: Shhh! Just announce it to the world, how about?Rachel: Okay. Hey, everybody! These two aren’t human! They’re half Greek god!…They don’t seem to care.
I think fish is nice, but then I think that rain is wet, so who am I to judge?
It was beautiful in a harsh I’m-going-to-gut-you-like-a-fish kind of way.
There is no fixed physical reality, no single perception of the world, just numerous ways of interpreting world views as dictated by one’s nervous system and the specific environment of our planetary existence.
But Grover’s voice was already growing fainter. ‘Sweet dreams. Don’t let me die!
If Marilyn Monroe was alive right now, what would she be doing?’Clawing at the roof of her coffin.
It was a trap after all,” Alric said. He turned to Royce. “My apologies for doubting your sound paranoia.
Yeah, well, food’s one of the five exceptions to Gamp’s Law of Elemental Transfigurations, said Ron, to general astonishment.
I’m not sure if there’s one right place I’m supposed to be, he said, but I know a couple of wrong places I’d give a second try in a heartbeat.
Are there weapons in a bookstore?”It’s a store full of books, which are objects that can be thrown as well as read,’ Monty replied blandly.The Crows cocked his head. ‘I had no idea you humans lived with so much danger.
On the first day Coraline’s family moved in, Miss Spink and Miss Forcible made a point of telling Coraline how dangerous the well was, and they warned her to be sure she kept away from it. So Coraline set off to explore for it, so that she knew where it was, to keep away from it properly.
I stayed up all night playing poker with tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died.
Coach Hedge came pounding up the stairs with Hazel at his hooves.“Where are they?” he demanded. “Who do I kill?”“No killing!” Annabeth ordered. “Just defend the ship!”“But they interrupted a Chuck Norris movie!
Pasteboard pies and paper flowers are being banished from the stage by the growth of that power of accurate observation which is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it….
I hate girls that giggle all the time… You hate any girl that David looks at.
Amy, Dan, and Nellie were sitting at a table in a conference room, examining reproductions of Franklin documents-some so rare, the librarians told her, the only copies existed in Paris. Yeah, here’s a rare grocery list, Dan muttered. Wow.
Your job is to focus on my personal happiness, she said, & I’ve got big plans, so break time is over.
Young people, nowadays, imagine that money is everything.Yes, murmured Lord Henry, settling his button-hole in his coat; and when they grow older they know it.
A Dauntless Ferris wheel wouldn’t have cars. You would just hang on tight with your hands, and good luck to you.
The truth is, every son raised by a single mom is pretty much born married. I don’t know, but until your mom dies it seems like all the other women in your life can never be more than just your mistress.
If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions?
Tell you what, you let me go, and I’ll ask you plenty of questions about your race. Until then, I’m slightly distracted with how this little vacation on the good ship Holy Sh*t is going to pan out for me.
Women intrinsically understand human dynamics, and that makes them unstoppable. Unfortunately, the average man is less adroit at fostering such rivalries, which is why most men remain average; males are better at hating things that can’t hate them back (e.g., lawnmowers, cats, the Denver Broncos, et cetera). They don’t see the big picture.
You see, I, unlike you, have been made a prefect, which means that I, unlike you, have the power to hand out punishments.”“Yeah,” said Harry, “but you, unlike me, are a git.
People usually asked her if she had a belly button. Of course she had a belly button. She couldn’t explain how. She didn’t really want to know.
Don’t care for her tongue, do you? How strange. I find it one of my favorite parts.Bones to Gregor
The more excited I get, the more I vibrate.Now there’s a thought, Lor says.If you mean what I think you mean, you want to shut the fuck up and never think it again, Ryodan says.
Of course, everyone’s parents are embarrassing. It goes with the territory. The nature of parents is to embarrass merely by existing, just as it is the nature of children of a certain age to cringe with embarrassment, shame, and mortification should their parents so much as speak to them on the street.
I’m the hunter, Elena reminded him. I should go first.Of course you may go first. When I am dead.
Um…Mercer? Haven’t seen you in nearly a month. I was expecting something like, ‘Oh Cross, love of my heart, fire of my loins, how I’ve longed–
We lay there and looked up at the night sky and she told me about stars called blue squares and red swirls and I told her I’d never heard of them. Of course not, she said, the really important stuff they never tell you. You have to imagine it on your own.
You want him to walk? Caleb demands. Are you insane?Did I shoot him in the leg? I say. No. He walks. Where do we go, Peter?
I had a dream about you. We installed Dr. Robert Jarvik’s artificial heart in a mannequin and brought it to life, only to later kill it because a creature that’s all fake heart and no brain is what’s commonly called a “politician,” and must be destroyed.
I made this [letter] very long, because I did not have the leisure to make it shorter.
Girls are so queer you never know what they mean. They say no when they mean yes, and drive a man out of his wits just for the fun of it.–Laurie
Percy was getting tired of water.If he said that aloud, he would probably get kicked out of Poseidon’s Junior Sea Scouts, but he didn’t care.
Frank didn’t drop you on purpose,” she said. “He’s not like that. He’s just a little clumsy sometimes.”“Oops,” Leo said, in his best Frank Zhang voice. “Dropped Leo into a squad of enemy soldiers. Dang it!
If you don’t get everything you want, think of the things you don’t get that you don’t want.
There is nothing particularly wrong with salmon, of course, but like caramel candy, strawberry yogurt, or liquid carpet cleaner, if you eat too much of it you are not going to enjoy your meal.
You’re thinking I’m one of those wise-ass California vegetarians who is going to tell you that eating a few strips of bacon is bad for your health. I’m not. I say its a free country and you should be able to kill yourself at any rate you choose, as long as your cold dead body is not blocking my driveway.
Before we go, I gotta know: If mind-reading abilities are real, there’s something else I wondered if fiction got right about vampires-Ask me if I sparkle and I’ll kill you where you stand, Bones cut him off with utmost seriousness.
Bones has always been smart, I muttered. His intelligence was just camouflaged under a mountain of p**sy.Cat
You, Ms. Lane, are a menace to others! A walking, talking catastrophe in pink!
I don’t really like coffee, she said, but I don’t really like it when my head hits my desk when I fall asleep either.